Today we are going to take some time to judge a few books by their covers.
We’re going to use books I haven’t read so that my judgments can be unbiased. I am, however, going to choose those books from among those young adult books recommended to me by Amazon based on my browsing history, which means that I will have a pretty good idea what they are like and my judgments may also therefore be completely biased.
Entwined cover, you’re pretty. Very pretty. I assume that because you are pretty, your book will be very good. This is always the case in life, is it not? I find myself intrigued by the vines in particular – will all this entwinement in the story be metaphorical (which seems likely) or literal (as implied by the presence of significant vine growth around the border)? I cannot wait to find out.
So I see gears and goggles, Goliath cover. Also some kind of flying animal ship and a crown. You wouldn’t happen to be a steampunk, would you? (Also, don’t try to deny it because I know you are because I read the first two books in your series.)
Hey, Inheritance cover. I don’t take kindly to your kind around here. And by “your kind” I mean books that stink. How’d you end up in books that I might want to buy? I know you’re a young adult book and I know you are about dragons and those are two things I enjoy. Also the dragon illustration on your cover is pretty charming and that is a nice shade of green you are made of and I even like that typeface that Inheritance is written in. But still – I can see the words “Christopher Paolini” splashed across the bottom of you, leaving me in little doubt that you are not a good book.
Clockwork Prince cover, I can tell that you are about an Asianish man who is likely made of clockwork. Perhaps he’s also a prince? A dragon prince, probably, judging from his glowing staff. Then again, your predecessor Clockwork Angel also featured a young man on the cover who I had once assumed to be made of clockwork, and he was not. I find that you are sending me mixed messages, Clockwork Variety of Characters series and I don’t much appreciate it.
Meanwhile, I have to get busy making some bear ears and watching Battlestar Galactica. Did you know that you can follow me on Twitter now? It’s @fauxspectacles. So far I don’t really Tweet much, I mostly follow. But I think I probably have lots of interesting and important things to say that you might want to hear.